Zoe is 2 months today! Some people have commented or asked about what we are doing out of curiosity and/or out of skepticism, so here I am to talk about it and our journey so far!
What does EC stand for?
It stands for "Elimination Communication".
What is EC?
It's a "...gentle, child-centric, gradual form of toilet-learning."
-Angie Decev
It is not a training program, it's a way to meet your baby's needs just as you do with eating and sleeping (since it's all they do for a while anyway).
"EC is not so much about the result (a toilet-independent child) as it is about the process of communication."
-Christine Gross-Loh, The Diaper Free Baby
Why did you CHOOSE to do it?
First, our friend’s children were out of diapers by 13 months and I got curious
I constantly consider how I can save money and create less waste
It's cleaner (in a sense) than traditional diapering
Our babies can potentially have little to no transition to being potty trained
Potty training can be extremely stressful to the parents and almost traumatizing to a child who is re-learning where to use the bathroom if they are attached to their diapers
The idea that our babies naturally don't want to soil themselves (hence fussing or crying as a newborn)...
...then we teach them overtime to get comfortable eliminating in their diaper, then try to UN-teach them to go in their diaper (and into a toilet) later on?? It made me question the traditional dynamic of baby elimination. lol
Children out of diapers sooner = less diapers = save money + less waste
It's an additional way to bond with our babies and meet their needs
Zoe and her daddy
How do you do it?
When your baby needs to eliminate, you take off their bottoms, hold them over a receptacle, allow them to eliminate, wipe clean, put their bottoms back on, and DONE!
Sounds a lot like how we adults use the bathroom, huh? That's the point. ;)
You can use sounds or words as your baby eliminates so they make the association, then use those sounds or words later on to help them eliminate at certain times.
our current set up. it has changed as we learned what was convenient for us and also because Zoe is growing (the potty used to be on the diaper changing table when she was smaller).
How often do you do it?
It's going to sound like a lot, but it's as often as you'd traditionally diaper change, and then some. But remember that the goal is to meet her needs through communication (which is another way to bond) and to not get her comfortable in her own soil (for the little to no transition later on).
At first, I wanted to see what she did when she was about to eliminate or while she eliminated, so I had some diaper free time on a disposable pad. Personally, I felt we just learned her cues naturally overtime. I started to offer the potty any time she woke up. Just like most people, they'll need to eliminate in the morning after a long stretch of sleep, and even after naps. If she fusses during or after feeding we potty her because that typically means she'll eliminate because she can't focus on eating or relaxing. If she wakes up mid-nap, because just like us grow-ups, we wake up to eliminate, we offer the potty. She sometimes goes back to sleep after or it's the end of her catnap.
If you're interested, there's a spectrum on how you can do it, and what I love about the EC community is everyone is supportive of how you choose to do it, even if you're someone who chooses to not start at all or decides to quit.
Full-time:
typically done when a parent or primary caregiver is with the baby at all times
Catch as much as possible throughout the day and night
Some parents may decide to do it at home only, and some may choose to do it everywhere they go
Part-time:
Catch whenever they are able to
Can be focused on...
mornings only
evenings before bed only
OR only catching bowel movements (more predictable because babies' cues are typically more obvious + more rewarding for mom or dad to not have to clean up a poopy diaper and a poop covered butt)
Where do they eliminate?
Into a receptacle such as a baby potty or a normal toilet with a seat reducer.
Newborn pee has little to no smell and their poop is basically liquid, so you could even hold them over a running sink, a bowl or Tupperware suffices if you don't have/can't get a baby potty, and HECK! if you're outside, they can go in the grass!
We were gifted a Baby Bjorn potty by some fellow ECers. She's still held over it since she can't hold her head up yet, plus she's so small still, she'd fall in. lol It'll be cute when she can sit up on it all on her own. We also EC her over a normal toilet because we can just flush it, rather than dump out her potty.
Do you really save time and money?
Time? Sometimes.
Pottying her can be quicker than a diaper change! Other times, she shows cues, we hold her over the potty, then nothing. If she gets upset, we don't keep her in distress as we want pottying to be a positive experience. Sometimes, we'll lay her down to get her diaper back on, THEN she goes. lol Those can turn into a whole clean up and clothing change or even a bath, but that's usually not the case.
Money? For sure.
In her 1st month, We didn't start EC until we got back from the hospital (plus I injured my tailbone during birth and could barely walk). There were about 10 days where we didn't try because I had breastfeeding issues and needed to focus on Zoe's weight, so we only had about 50 catches (potentially saved diapers) and only actually saved* 8 diapers.
"saves" refer to her having a clean diaper before pottying and being able to put it back on after pottying, like underwear.
In her 2nd month, after getting the hang of everything being a newborn parent comes with, we had over 160 catches (potentially saved diapers) and actually saved about 80 diapers.
Who is EC not for?
Pessimists and disrespectful people. It's important to respect every parent's ability and decision to do certain things, just like every other aspect of parenting. Some people do not have the physical capability to EC their baby fully, and that's okay.
But other than that, ECing is for everyone that's open to trying it!
When can we start?
You can start anytime! At the hospital, when you come home, a few weeks in, a few months in, or just wait to do conventional potty training!
Keep in mind that it is COMPLETELY NORMAL to hit a potty pause when your child is trying to learn something else developmentally (crawling, eating, walking, etc.). They may not cue/communicate (resulting in misses) or may refuse to sit on their potty or on a toilet.
Don't get me wrong...
ECing is NOT a breeze. We chose to start with Zoe because
One, we were aware of it (many parents don't discover EC until after their first child is grown), And two, becoming a parent changes your life completely, so why not start ECing as you learn to become a parent? Especially, since we don't know any different than a kid-free life before. lol
ECing early on does not guarantee we will not have to potty train later on. She could be out of diapers by 8 months, 13 months, 18 months, or more! Every child is different. Enjoy the process and bond with your child. Take a break if it is becoming too stressful for you and/or your baby at the time.
In the future, we hope to...
Transition to cloth diapers when we have more catches/less misses (AKA better communication) while she's still not walking.
Transition to DIAPER FREE when we have little to no misses (AKA great communication) when she's able to walk. *This is where potty-trained kiddos would be.
Here are some of my favorite quotes from "The Diaper Free Baby" book so far:
"...exclusively diapered babies have actually been trained to go in their diapers. I often point out that many newborns will pee when their diapers are off, only to stop doing so as they become conditioned to go only in a diaper. (Some babies will even wait and go to the bathroom as soon as they're changed into a fresh diaper!) Parents who diaper their babies full-time are training their babies to use the diaper for their toileting needs, a habit parents will have to "unteach" a few years down the road."
"...this is not a coercive training program but rather a great way to follow your baby's cues and natural biological development."
"EC is amazingly similar to breastfeeding on cue; you're just dealing with the other end of the feeding equation and looking for elimination signals versus hunger signals.
-Megan, mom to Noemi, 30 months"
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